Introduction

As everyone should know by now, assuming that you are my friend, I am a shoesalesman at a major department store. in the Women's Shoe Department. I work with whom I like to call, Rookie Bitches, and the New Crew. The Rookie Bitches are the one's that have been there for more than a few months. Yuh, fully aware that rookie=new; however, I've been saying it wrong for two weeks and frankly, it has a nice ring to it.

Not only do I have to deal with the Rookie Bitches and their hiding shoes, being bitchy, and down right rude, I have to deal with messy, bitchy, time-wasting customers. And let me say this now, women are messier than guys. I don't care what you say, what your mom says, or what God says cuz they obviously don't work in the shoe department at a major department store. So they can stfu.

Before I get to a few disaster stories–just so we're all on the same page–I must further explain the Rookie Bitches and their ridiculous antics. I won't use names, just initials just in case they know how to read and find time out of their miserable lives to search the web for mean things people have to say about them (you can never be too safe).

MK- The Queenbee. She's tall, she's pretty, and she's ridiculous. She constantly reminds me to pick up my drops (shoes that I brought out for customers and didn't want) like I was born yesterday. She also will not hesitate to think she's the manager...which she's not...she must not have gotten the memo.

CN- The Nice Bitch. She's super nice, unless you understand sarcasm and read between the lines.

MC- The Male Version of MK. I seriously think they're fucking.

RH- The One No One Cares About. Meh.

DM- The Only Cool One. She's apart of the Rookie Bitches by default. She's actually amazing.

LY- The Loser.

NY- The Old Mega Bitch. She's wrinkly. She's got bitch lines all over her face.

GL- The Foreigner. I don't know where she's from, but hopefully she goes back. She's totally a bitch with an accent who may or may not be the first person to get smacked.

...and there's two more, but I don't remember them.

And finally, the New Crew.

HM- The Sweet Aunt. She would be the best Aunt ever. I love her.

JF- The Purchase Idiot. Ugh. She's so stupid. She's been working there longer than I have and I can do so much more than her. Btw, she pressed purchase.

LU- The Perky One. She's so perky and she's gonna break her hand waving to me. She gets extra excited.

The Women's Shoe Department has four stock rooms: Heels, Boots, Hosiery, and Juniors. Despite common sense, the shoes are not separated by designer, but by color and height of the heel. I will never understand the difference between mid-low and mid; nor high and very high. Honestly, they all look the same. On the bottom of the shoe, it will tell you which isle the shoe is in...if you're lucky. And just because it tells you were it's at, doesn't mean it will be there. So basically, you're fucked.

Ok, we're all on the same page. Instead of telling you past stories, I'll just update after work. The stories never end.